Valentines Gifts Him and Her

valentine kidsA Gift for Valentine Day

David Letterman

Valentine’s Day money-saving tips: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th. In place of bubble bath, use lavender-scented dish-washing liquid.

You won’t get away with that but my friend at the end of the Great Depression did exactly that and the girls all knew it. He always broke up to avoid gifting and then made up after the crisis was over. Now it’s:

A Valentine gift for him.

A Valentine gift for her.

We just get over Christmas, emptying our purses, and it is time to spend again. But we really don’t think that way do we. We just think of those we love, now it is special time, and we buy them a Valentine gift. I always buy my daughter a gift because she is our only daughter. Forget the boys! LOL!

valentien engageI usually buy my daughter a necklace or flowers or a basket her family can nibble out of. A gift doesn’t have to be expensive unless you are going to propose marriage on Valentine Day. Then you will need an engagement ring.

When I was a kid we had to give a valentine to every kid in class. Then when we got home, we erased the names and put them on the doorsteps on our friends. We would knock on the door and then run for absolutely no reason at all.

We use to give those 8.5″ by 11″ one-sheet cards with a humorous but sometime vulgar message. What great fun! I tried to find some of those on the net but could not. I did find a few jokes:

Lewis Black
“Valentine’s Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don’t have a special someone, you’re alone.”

Ed Helms
“February is a month of months, and there is one special day: Valentine’s Day on the 14th. I know it’s still a ways off, but I just can’t wait. Janice, if you’re watching, will you make me the happiest man in the world and get out of my apartment?”

Laura Kightlinger
“It goes Christmas, New Year’s Eve, Valentine’s Day. Is that fair to anyone who’s alone? These are all days you gotta be with someone. And if you didn’t get around to killing yourself at Christmas or New Year’s, boom! There’s Valentine’s Day. I think there should be one more after Valentine’s Day just called, ‘Who could love you?'”

George Lopez
“The jewelry stores say, ‘Tell your wife you love her with a diamond,’ while wives tell you they love you with, ‘Ok, but just because it’s Valentine’s Day.'”

David Letterman
Valentine’s Day money-saving tips:
Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.
In place of bubble bath, use lavender-scented dish-washing liquid.

Dean Martin: Everybody….

I think everybody loves someone even if in secret. That was a great thing in grade school. You could put a lovely valentine that you took out of last year’s box, and erased the name, and send it to that cute girls with the big green eyes without your name on it. You, the secret lover.

Almost any gift imaginable is good for men.
Golf shoes, a hunting rifle, skis, a new jacket, other clothing, a watch, you name it. But for a woman or girl., it had better be romantic like flowers, candy, clothing or jewelry. OK, she needs a new Maytag kitchen appliance.

Anyway, think ahead and have some fun!


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